"This is Chrys Fey reporting for Disaster 5 News. I am in Miami where a tsunami hit yesterday morning. I have Clyde Beauregard with me, a survivor of the tsunami. Clyde, can you tell our viewers what happened, and how you survived?"
"Well, that depends. Can I have your number maybe?"
"No, sir. Just tell us your story."
"Oh fine. Let's see now. I was just strolling on the beach yesterday, looking at gir--I mean shells and whatnot, when the water just up and left."
"Do you mean the waves receded?"
"That's what I said!"
"Sorry, sir. Please continue."
"Well, I had my coon dog, Booger, with me and he just went nuts. There were crabs an' some fish an' all sorts of stuff for him to sniff and roll in. Not as bad as cow poop, I guess, but fish do stink--"
"How did other people react?"
"Most were confused or just taking pictures, you know? Nobody was panicky or anything. Not then."
"Then what happened?"
"Well, you could see something on the horizon. This white foam. The closer it got to the beach, the bigger it got. People got excited 'cause after a while, lookin' at the sand got kind of boring."
"What happened next, Mr. Beauregard?"
"Half the folks started going toward the water to get a better look, and the other half started backing up."
"And which half were you in, Mr. Beauregard?"
"Well, Booger spotted something and started diggin' like nobody's business, so I took after him. Big mistake. The wave hit and knocked me an' Booger ass for teakettle. And did we move? Boy howdy! That water spun us round and round, worse than a washing machine on heavy duty. Stuff knocked into you and you didn't what it was. Car? Garbage can? Lounge chair? No idea. But you want to know the worst part?"
"At one point? Water ripped off my shorts! I kid you not. I would've been jay-bird naked if it didn't wrap me in a sequined lady's sarong from one of those fancy-pants boutiques."
"That sounds terrifying!"
"You're telling me! Neon green looks terrible with my skin color."
"Um. Yes. Where did you end up?"
"Well, you probably won't believe it, but I came to somewhere in Jungle Island with a parrot sticking its tongue in my ear and a huge cat lying in the mud not five feet from me. Poor thing. I swear it looked like the wave ripped off the stripes from a tiger and slapped them on a lion."
"You mean you woke up next to a liger?"
"A what now?"
"Never mind. What happened to your dog, um, Booger?"
"Oh, him? Well, he was hiding under a bridge between a llama and a pot-bellied pig. I thought I had it bad with the dress, but poor Booger had him on a pair of Ray-Bans, a Marlin's baseball cap, and a diamond studded bikini top wrapped around his middle. Dang! I haven't seen him look that embarrassed since he met the wrong end of a skunk. Let me tell you--"
"Thank you, Mr. Beauregard. That's all we need."
"Fine. You sure I can't have your number?"
Hello, folks. The above silliness featuring my muse, Clyde Beauregard, is part of Chrys Fey's I Survived Blogfest in honor of her new book, Tsunami Crimes, third in her disaster crimes series. Actual tsunamis are horrifying. You need only see movies like The Impossible or check out the footage of the 2004 tsunami in Thailand or the 2011 tsunami in Japan on YouTube to get an idea of their destructive power. If you are ever on a beach and the waves recede to a great degree, do run quickly and find higher ground.
Title: Tsunami Crimes
Series: Disaster Crimes #3
Author: Chrys Fey
Page Count: 272
BLURB: Beth and Donovan have come a long way from Hurricane Sabrina and the San Francisco earthquake. Now they are approaching their wedding day and anxiously waiting to promise each other a lifetime of love. The journey down the aisle isn’t smooth, though, as they receive threats from the followers of the notorious criminal, Jackson Storm. They think they’ll be safe in Hawaii, but distance can’t stop these killers. Not even a tsunami can.
This monstrous wave is the most devastating disaster Beth has ever faced. It leaves her beaten, frightened. Is she a widow on her honeymoon? As she struggles to hold herself together and find Donovan, she’s kidnapped by Jackson's men.
Fearing her dead, Donovan searches the rubble and shelters with no luck. The thought of her being swept out to sea is almost too much for him to bear, but the reality is much worse. She’s being used as bait to get him to fall into a deadly trap.
If they live through this disaster, they may never be the same again.
99 CENTS: Amazon
And everywhere ebooks are sold.
Are you ready to celebrate or are you stocking your basement with tuna and bottled water? Yep, we are getting a new president today in the US. Hopefully he will be too busy with all the inaugural balls to instigate any international incidents. (Sigh) I need a happy place. How about you? Here's some pictures of the grand trees along my new favorite walking spot in Durand Park.
Genuine U-shaped tree
Love the contrasting colors of this bark
Good place for a fairy tale
Thanks to our host, Lexa Cain, and cohosts: L.G. Keltner and Tonya Drecker. How are you celebrating/surviving inauguration day? Seen The Impossible? Ready to dive into a romance/suspense novel?
Want to read more crazy tsunami tales? Here's your opportunity: